THIS MUST MEAN THAT POTTERMORE IS CLOSE TO OPENING!
Normal <strike>teenagers</strike> twenty year olds who still live at home while not at college when parents are away: PARTY, ALCOHOL, SEX
Me when parents are away: I CAN SING OUT LOUD AND EAT EVERYTHING
Col. Brandon is a sexy tattooed bario boy. There, with that out of the way, I can actually talk about the quality of the movie.
A sexy, late-twenties man who fixes things, has what look like MS13 tattooes, decorates with a bird-of-paradise motif, and motuhes off at Marianne instead of just mooning over her. Darn it, there I go again! For reals this time.
Col. Brandon—no, no! Gonna do it for real this time.
I expected Prada to Nada to disappoint. I expected massive liberties to be taken with plot, characters, and message. I expected hammy, novella-style acting and totally predictable plot twists.
Pass the steak sauce, ‘cause those words are lookin’ mighty tasty right about now! (You know what else looks pretty tasty? Sexy hispanic Col. Brandon.)
The acting at times is sketchy, but I don’t know if I can at any point call the writing sketchy. The writing is by no means perfect, but it is appropriate. It is fitting. Like Lower East Side LA where most the story takes place, the writing is colorful, both foreign and familiar, steeped in fascinating culture and charm, and begs and earns forgiveness for its failings because those flaws are what makes it genuine.
The characters are… different. These are not the Elinor and Marianne from the novel, but these girls are so flawed and fantastic for their roles that one wouldn’t dream of switching them for anyone else. Col. Brandon is amazing and I love him. He is selfless, looks every bit the hispanic gang-banger, and loses none of that as he proves himself to be the same glorious man I’ve already fallen in love with twice. Fanny Dashwood has lost all subtlety in her Disney Villain status, but that’s okay. Edward rebounding in a heartbeat instead of having a secret fiancee was a—excuse my language—fucking brilliant choice, and one of the best changes made to the movie. I love what they did with John Dashwood’s character, and the fact that the writers cut everything extraneous to the central plot: goodbye third sister, goodbye mother, goodbye Col. Brandon’s first love, goodbye Robert Ferrars, goodbye everything that made Emma Thomson’s more “faithful” adaptation over two hours. Goodbye, and happy riddance!
The integration of hispanic American culture blew my mind. This was so authentic, so impossible to fake that there’s no way any syndicated TV series would have been able to replicate it. Simply fantastic.
This movie was ten times better than I gave it any chance of being at the outset. Watch the heck out of this movie. Elinor is a lawyer. Edward has none of his original flaws, but rather new, better flaws. Marianne really learns good lessons. Col. Brandon almost always has a bowl of cereal, and it gets pretty funny after a while. Just watch this movie.
I think everybody has a few songs that, regardless of where you are or who you’re with, you just turn it up, roll down the windows, and sing along like a happy jerk. In a short list, here are mine:
- Bohemian Rhapsody - Queen
- Don’t Bring Me Down - ELO
- Streetlight People (just barely - not so much the cranking up and rolling down part) - Journey
So, tumblog followers, or whoever happens to see this, what are your blast-it-like-you-don’t-care-who’s-listening songs?
Stay frosty, my friends.